- Are you SURE you are not having twins? I mean, how many ultrasounds have you really had? Is the doctor positive there isn't another baby hiding in there?
- How big is your husband? He must be a huge guy. No, really how tall is he?
- TWO MORE MONTHS left?!! You look like you are due any minute!
- This must be hard on you since you can't have fun at all if you are pregnant.
- How do you get up now? Do you need help getting out of bed in the morning?
Comments NOT to Make to a Pregnant Woman
Guess what? I have a mirror at home and I can see how big I am getting. In fact, I bet most pregnant women also have a mirror at home and are monitoring their growth. Luckily I have gotten used to the fact that people say whatever comes to mind when they see me. I don't take it personally anymore and I'm really starting to find the amusement in the comments I get. I have noted some of the most memorable comments I have heard in the past few weeks.
Breast Feeding Anxiety
I had one of my first psycho pregnancy moments at around 8 weeks when I told my husband that I wanted to take a breast feeding class. His response was "Even animals breast feed Carly, it can't be hard. It is totally natural, why in the world would you need to take a class?". We don't need to get into the details but I can assure you it wasn't a fun rest of the evening for Dave.
I have heard more horror stories about breast feeding than labor. Aside from getting it to work, how long to feed, how to have the baby latch, being in pain, etc., I just don't know where I feel it is appropriate to feed your baby.
I have mentioned before how many females we have in my family. I don't think I noted that they are all very opinionated females. At one family event when I was a kid, a male relative made some comment about how if someone in the family was breastfeeding, they should go into one of the back bedrooms alone. Everyone has been talking about what a jerk he is for the last 20 years. I was raised to believe that women get to decide what happens with their babies and their bodies.
But...I do live in Boulder and people are always pushing the limit and making me uncomfortable. In my last yoga class, a woman brought her baby. The baby slept most of the time but woke up and was fussy in the last half of class. I was in my deep meditative state as we did some breathing exercises on the exercise ball when I opened my eyes slightly to see that the woman had taken her shirt off and was sitting on the ball bouncing and breast feeding. You must be kidding me right?! And, last week when Dave and I went to interview a pediatrician, there was a woman baring all - and I do mean all, in the lobby. The baby was clearly not interested in eating and she was trying to coax the baby into eating for all to see! When she was called in for the appointment, she gave the baby to her husband and even stood up and started walking into her appointment before covering herself up -- excuse me!
I need all women to help me out for the next few months. I'm not asking you to hide out in a back bedroom, but for the love of God, cover yourself up a little bit!
I have heard more horror stories about breast feeding than labor. Aside from getting it to work, how long to feed, how to have the baby latch, being in pain, etc., I just don't know where I feel it is appropriate to feed your baby.
I have mentioned before how many females we have in my family. I don't think I noted that they are all very opinionated females. At one family event when I was a kid, a male relative made some comment about how if someone in the family was breastfeeding, they should go into one of the back bedrooms alone. Everyone has been talking about what a jerk he is for the last 20 years. I was raised to believe that women get to decide what happens with their babies and their bodies.
But...I do live in Boulder and people are always pushing the limit and making me uncomfortable. In my last yoga class, a woman brought her baby. The baby slept most of the time but woke up and was fussy in the last half of class. I was in my deep meditative state as we did some breathing exercises on the exercise ball when I opened my eyes slightly to see that the woman had taken her shirt off and was sitting on the ball bouncing and breast feeding. You must be kidding me right?! And, last week when Dave and I went to interview a pediatrician, there was a woman baring all - and I do mean all, in the lobby. The baby was clearly not interested in eating and she was trying to coax the baby into eating for all to see! When she was called in for the appointment, she gave the baby to her husband and even stood up and started walking into her appointment before covering herself up -- excuse me!
I need all women to help me out for the next few months. I'm not asking you to hide out in a back bedroom, but for the love of God, cover yourself up a little bit!
My Mom = My Best Friend
I hope you all had a very special Mother's Day. It was a gorgeous day in Boulder and we had both of our families and some close family friends over for a BBQ. It is exciting to think that next year I will officially be a mom too. I did magically get a few cards from Samantha with some help from Dave and Aunt Patty so I know she is looking forward to it too.
I figure it is the right time of year to write a little something about my mom Ava. When I was a bratty teenager my mom used to say to me "You might not know it yet, but I am your best friend." Over the years, I have realized how true that is. I'm lucky to live close to her and we have lunch once a week and I talk to her at least once a day...about everything.
My mom never holds back what she is thinking so for about 4 years I have been hearing about how she needs a grandchild. She definitely wins the prize for most excited about the baby. While I am happy about having a baby, I also get scared, nervous and panicked - my mom is only ecstatic, all the time. And, as with other experiences in my life, she has made me feel supported, loved, and optimistic about my pregnancy at every step. Somehow she has also avoided making me mad (which is very impressive) and has listened to me complain about everyone who has upset me during my moody phases. My mom "gets me" like nobody else.
After the baby is born, my mom will watch Samantha when I go back to work so I know they will have a special relationship too. And, even if it takes Samantha a while to realize it, I hope that eventually I'll be her best friend too.
I figure it is the right time of year to write a little something about my mom Ava. When I was a bratty teenager my mom used to say to me "You might not know it yet, but I am your best friend." Over the years, I have realized how true that is. I'm lucky to live close to her and we have lunch once a week and I talk to her at least once a day...about everything.
My mom never holds back what she is thinking so for about 4 years I have been hearing about how she needs a grandchild. She definitely wins the prize for most excited about the baby. While I am happy about having a baby, I also get scared, nervous and panicked - my mom is only ecstatic, all the time. And, as with other experiences in my life, she has made me feel supported, loved, and optimistic about my pregnancy at every step. Somehow she has also avoided making me mad (which is very impressive) and has listened to me complain about everyone who has upset me during my moody phases. My mom "gets me" like nobody else.
After the baby is born, my mom will watch Samantha when I go back to work so I know they will have a special relationship too. And, even if it takes Samantha a while to realize it, I hope that eventually I'll be her best friend too.
Birthing Class
Last night we attended our first birthing class. This class will meet every Wednesday in the month of May for three hours a class. I was really excited for this class to start so that we could meet some other pregnant couples and to learn more about the whole labor and delivery process.
First, let me discuss the demographics of the class. Dave was concerned we would be in a new age, hippie class and have to hug the other couples and talk about our feelings. This was not yoga but remember we are still in Boulder. The majority of the couples were quite a bit older than us and about a third of the class has a midwife rather than a doctor.
That being said, our teacher is new to Boulder from Washington D.C. and she mainly stuck to her posters and powerpoint presentation for the first half of the class. She sufficiently scared me with her life size pictures of the womb and her real pelvic bone prop complete with a baby doll banging into the bones to show the causes of back labor. How do women do this again? I think I asked about 80% of the questions during class.
We did some nice breathing exercises for the early stages of labor and ended the class with the lights off, listening to music and doing a total body relaxation practice. A little new agey maybe, but trying to breath and relax while bringing a child into the world can't be too bad a thing right?
First, let me discuss the demographics of the class. Dave was concerned we would be in a new age, hippie class and have to hug the other couples and talk about our feelings. This was not yoga but remember we are still in Boulder. The majority of the couples were quite a bit older than us and about a third of the class has a midwife rather than a doctor.
That being said, our teacher is new to Boulder from Washington D.C. and she mainly stuck to her posters and powerpoint presentation for the first half of the class. She sufficiently scared me with her life size pictures of the womb and her real pelvic bone prop complete with a baby doll banging into the bones to show the causes of back labor. How do women do this again? I think I asked about 80% of the questions during class.
We did some nice breathing exercises for the early stages of labor and ended the class with the lights off, listening to music and doing a total body relaxation practice. A little new agey maybe, but trying to breath and relax while bringing a child into the world can't be too bad a thing right?
Prep Day
Saturday was a great prep day for the baby. First, my in laws and Dave painted the nursery green. They did a wonderful job and the color turned out great. While they painted, I went to lunch with April, a friend from book club, who brought her 8 week baby girl Audrey. It was fun to hear all about April's experiences so far and Audrey was absolutely adorable, I think I could have stared at her for the entire day.For dinner, we met up with some friends Dave knows from law school who are also expecting their first baby soon. You know how I keep asking "how am I possibly going to get bigger than I already am?" Well, Julia who is due any day now answered that question. Now I have a pretty good idea of what I will look like in two months. It was fun to meet a couple going through the same things as us.
We finished up the evening by painting 3 big pink circles above the crib. I have wanted to do this in the nursery for a long time but wasn't sure we could pull it off. Dave did the circles perfectly and we hung a letter in each circle so that it reads SAM. It looks exactly the way I was hoping - I love it.
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