Letting Go of the Grudge in 2009

I come from a long line of grudge holders. My grandfather didn't talk to his own brother for over 15 years because of an argument they got in. My mom is pretty bad herself and I might seem like I let things go, but trust me I don't. I've talked before on this blog about how I also have a tendency to feel guilty about things. I've realized that just as it is hard for me to forgive others, it is even harder for me to forgive myself.

So, my number one resolution for 2009 is to let some personal grudges go (I'll work on forgiving the rest of you next year). Below is a short list of some of the things I regularly feel guilty or upset with myself about - but that I am letting go of in 2009.

* About three years ago, I missed a meeting with my CEO because I stayed out late with my coworkers in NYC the night before. I still feel horrible about how irresponsible that was.

* I didn't invite my friend Deirdre to our wedding. Dave made a rule that if we hadn't kept in touch with people we shouldn't invite them. She is a good friend now and I always feel bad she wasn't there.

* I am upset that my labor was so hard and lasted so long. I feel like I should have asked the nurse to get the doctor before I pushed for two hours. Somehow I feel like I could have avoided how horrible the whole experience was.

* I feel bad that I talk about how horrible my labor was when I have such a precious, good natured and beautiful baby.

-- Oh and a side note for my Grandma, none of these things are true. You know I am perfect and I love you.

Here's to letting it go in 2009! Happy New Year!!

O hanukkah O hanukkah, Come light the menorah ...


Samantha celebrated her first night of her first Hanukkah on Sunday. Not only did she get a very fun exersaucer from her Grammy and G-daddy, she got to play with all of her favorite people including baby Zoe. We all ate delicious latkes and Judy's famous matzo ball soup (my favorite). You can see all the Hanukkah pictures here. We will continue the celebration over the 8 nights of Hanukkah. This is the beginning of a lifetime of holiday overload in her interfaith family. Let the fun begin!

Sammy and Santa x Two

As I said in my last post, Samantha met Santa at the mall last week. Santa Claus also made a surprise appearance at Deirdre's brunch on Sunday. That was hilarious. Deirdre's daughter Marina was not a fan, but Samantha didn't seem to be phased by him.



The FAKE Santa!

I will warn you that this story is not very politically correct. Today we took Samantha to get her first picture taken with Santa. She looked adorable and smiled for Santa - I'll scan the picture soon so you can see.

As we made plans for the visit to Santa, I was thinking about a funny Santa experience I had as a kid. When I was about 5 years old we went to visit my grandparents in Oklahoma for Christmas. I remember this Christmas really well, probably because I was at an age where I wholeheartedly believed in Santa Claus. I can recall being concerned about how Santa would find me in Oklahoma if he knew I lived in Colorado.

My Grandma got me all decked out in my new Denver Broncos cheerleading outfit that she made for me and we set off to the mall to get my photo taken with Santa. As my Grandma tells it, as we walked into the mall I gasped and exclaimed to her "Oh no Grandma! It's a FAKE!" Being the accommodating young girl that I was (and a good actress) I went ahead and climbed onto this so-called Santa's lap and got my photo taken. So, why was I so sure that it was a fake you ask? My Grandma scanned the picture here for me to share the answer with all of you.

Live in the Moment


Last week Samantha passed the five month mark. It is amazing to me how much she learns and develops every day. It is as though every few weeks she is a whole new baby. I try not to dwell on how fast it is going by because it really is special to watch her grow and learn.

She is finally rolling over now - my Aunt Paula said that Samantha would never roll over because nobody ever puts her down and boy is that true. But she is starting to get heavy for me to hold all the time and I think that helped to encourage me to lay her down more and get her rolling! She can also sit up on her own for a little bit.

Samantha is very ticklish and she laughs in delight when I tickle her. She has also quickly fallen for Javier the pug. She thinks he is the greatest thing around. She has been known to snap right out of crying to give Javier a big smile. He is not as fond of her but I'm sure he will come around when she can throw him some food.

When we were in Nebraska I noticed that she really enjoyed interactive toys with music and lights. We set up this jumper at my parents' house and although she hasn't gotten the hang of jumping, she definitely enjoys spinning around and playing with all the fun, musical toys. I posted some new photos here, I need to work on getting pictures from our trip to Nebraska.

Smooth Traveling

After our trip to Florida, I definitely had my reservations about our trip to Nebraska for Thanksgiving and the family reunion. I felt like I had just gotten Samantha back to a normal sleep routine after the first trip and I was not looking forward to being away from home again.

I am happy to report that we had a wonderful trip. For starters, the hour long flight was a breeze. We stayed at Aunt Patty and Uncle Steve's house which made things so easy. They have a beautiful and large home with plenty of room for all of us. They also have a great set up with a crib, monitor and toys. Aunt Patty made sure we had everything we needed for Samantha and it was great to be at a house for the holiday and events so that if it was nap time, Samantha could sleep rather than miss her nap or have a meltdown.

It was so fun to see everyone and visit with the cousins. And, thanks to my mother in law Judy, I even got to do some extra things like get a pedicure and go to a party while Samantha was settled and happy with her Grammy.

Next up...Aspen after Christmas. With parents like us, Samantha is going to have to learn how to be a good traveler one way or another!