Holiday Recap

We had a jam packed holiday season and I'm worn out.  Just as I imagined, Samantha loved every minute. 

Hanukkah was early this year and Samantha got a very special castle menorah from Grammy and Pops.  She wanted to light the candles as soon as she woke up every morning and constantly was asking me "Should we play dreidel now?"   I was concerned that once Hanukkah was over we were going to have a tough time explaining that she would no longer be receiving a present every day but she took it all in stride. 

Then we had Christmas! Samantha is at a particularly fun age for the whole excitement of Santa and we took advantage of using the bribery of Santa to get her to do things leading up to Christmas - all you had to do was mention Santa and she would start behaving good again.  She visited Santa and made it clear that she would like dishes this year. 

She received so many wonderful presents throughout the month - a barn, a dollhouse, clothes, art supplies, an easel, etc.  But, her big gift from Santa was a fully stocked kitchen complete with dishes, food, pots, pans and more which she absolutely adores.  

And, best of all, I'm feeling like as a family, we have really got this holiday celebration down now.  I've mentioned before that when Dave and I first started living together, it was a challenge trying to figure out what felt comfortable to both of us.  But I think we have it figured out now and can simply enjoy all the fun of both holidays with our extended family as well. 

Home Stretch

Here I am today, in my 33 week of pregnancy.  It is hard not to compare this pregnancy to last.  In my last pregnancy I was on bed rest by this time so I've been a bit on edge lately.  However, I went to the doctor this morning and everything is looking good.  My blood pressure is low, no swelling, I'm not leaking protein and the baby's heart rate is perfect.  As the doctor said, this is just going to be a different kind of pregnancy for me.

I have still been trying to keep up with my Boulder ways, I've been taking a weekly prenatal yoga class, a weekly prenatal swim class and I'm still trying to get to boot camp once a week.  I have to say, that swim class is my favorite time of the week.  The whole time I just tell the teacher how good I feel.  It really is a good workout and the buoyancy seems to take all my aches and pains away. 

Much to the dismay of the Boulder moms in my classes, I have opted to schedule another c-section.  In many parts of the country, a c-section is mandatory.  In Boulder, my doctors would let me try not to but after what I went through last time, we all felt that it is the best option for me to go with a c-section.  Right now, we are on the books for February 7, 2011.  

Golden Child?

It started when Samantha was about two days old, the nurses in the hospital kept telling us how we should feel very fortunate to have a baby with such a good temperament.  Overall, she has been a good sleeper, a good eater and very kind.  People are frequently reminding us of how lucky we are to have a special, easy going child and trust me, we get it.

I wish we could take credit for many of the things she does so easily but the truth of the matter is that I think much of it is plain old luck.  Potty training has been a perfect example.  Now, I will say that my mom began potty training in September and Samantha was not at all interested.   We decided to take a break and begin again.  This time, she was just potty trained.  Sure, we read books and prepared; we made a big deal when she was successful.  But when it came down to it, we didn't do much at all.  It has been a few weeks, and I can count on one hand the number of accidents she has had.  No big deal.

We keep debating if our luck is up with baby #2.  I do think it is funny because right from the beginning, people want to take a mean twist on it.  When Samantha was a few weeks old,  a neighbor told us "You know what they say....great baby means a horrible teenager!" As Carina kicks and moves like a little maniac inside me, everyone says "This is going to be your wild one".  Why can't I have two golden children? 

Nesting

According to the books, around the fifth month of pregnancy, the "nesting" instinct can set in. This is an uncontrollable urge to prepare a nest for the new baby, to tie up loose ends of old projects and to organize your world.

About three weeks ago, "nesting" began taking control of me, I began washing all of the baby clothes, pulling out baby gear, buying gifts for the holidays and beyond, getting things in order and preparing the nursery.  I mentioned earlier that we did a little art project in the new room. Ironically, the art project has a little bird nest incorporated into it!  Now, you can see the final results.  It is a very sweet and cozy room, a place where I hope Carina will be very happy.

Meaning: Beloved

We have settled on a name for our new little girl.  I know some of you like surprises but since I don't, you all get to know. You may recognize the name as it has been the inspiration for a few songs, such as:



and:



The meaning is beloved and I think that is especially fitting for this baby.  We are going use the spelling of our dear friend from high school Carina.  Her middle name will be Jean, after Dave's grandma Carol Jean, my Dad's brother Gene Erger and my baby sister Madeline Gene.

Big Girl Week

We had been using our big trip to Nebraska as an excuse to put off a few milestones we needed to address.  Primarily the switch to the big girl bed and potty training.  So in typical fashion, we jumped in with both feet as soon as we got home and got started.

We picked out Samantha's new bedroom furniture about a month ago and had it scheduled to be delivered the day after we got home from our trip.  Once it was all set up we played on it and made a big fuss.  Samantha exclaimed that her new big girl bed was "so awesome" and "really cute".

I am admittedly not very good with change.  I tend to over think things and I did my best to play it cool as we set everything up. We had our normal bedtime routine reading books, saying prayers and talking about our day.  Then, I tried to leave the room as usual but when I closed the door, I heard Samantha begin to cry.  Then I heard her say as she fought back tears and sounded more frantic, "Mommy, Mommy - I think I still need my baby bed".   I'll remind you that I am 7 months pregnant and may be a bit more emotional than usual. I burst into tears and began sobbing.  Every time I think about it, I start to cry again! Certainly there is a huge part of me that is not ready for my baby girl to be such a big girl either.  Once I got myself under control, I went in and sat with her until she fell asleep and she slept soundly until morning.

These changes have been harder on me than expected although I'm adjusting and we will all be fine.  I've found that you can read all the instructional parenting books you want but you can never quite prepare yourself for how you will feel when milestones happen.  On the bright side, the first few days of potty training have been hugely successful!  In high school, one of our teachers always told us - Change is inevitable, growth is optional.  I think that was even Dave's senior quote in the yearbook.  I think about it often and as in all things am looking for all my lessons so that we can grow as a family through all of our changes.

Gratitude

We just got back to Boulder after a great trip to Omaha, Nebraska visiting Dave's extended family for Thanksgiving.  We stayed at Aunt Patty and Uncle Steve's house which is always a treat and Samantha was in heaven with all the toys, dishes, activities and cousins! She was in awe of her older cousins and played dress up with them and put on shows, it was a very exciting week. 

This Thanksgiving we sure have a lot to be thankful for with a sweet two year old and a baby on the way. Over the past few months, I have incorporated prayers into Samantha's bedtime routine.  This is much less about any religious practice and more about being thankful for all that we have.  I truly believe that feeling grateful for what we have in our lives attracts more of what we appreciate and value. 

It is pretty incredible to hear in Sammy's words, what she appreciates. She is always saying thank you for all of her family, for Javier the dog, for all her babies and for her toys. She says things like "Thank you so much for Gramps, he is really funny."  She is very good about remembering people that I may forget like people she just met, teachers at her classes or her friends. I'm hoping that starting early will help to instill a thoughtful and thankful attitude in Samantha, so far so good! 

No More Secrets

Now that Miss Samantha Lee is talking, she is also letting us know about everything that happens when we are not around.  For better or for worse, there are no more secrets where she is concerned.  It started out with her telling us how Grammy yells at the deer in the yard.  Apparently Grammy gets very angry and yells "Get out of here you deer!" I wish I had Samantha on video reenacting this - it was priceless.

The other day, I stopped at the gas station where Samantha told me she should be getting a "special treat".  I guess Daddy gets them both a special chocolate covered cherry treat when he goes to the gas station - who knew!

And, I know I'm not exempt either.  Recently my mom told me that during my pregnancy I am giving Samantha a complex by telling her how heavy she is.  I guess that as Samantha was picking up one of her babies she said in a very exhausted voice,"Oh Sue, you are very heavy, you are too heavy for me to hold now".

Attached

One of the many surprises that I've had since becoming a mom is how attached I am to Samantha.  I just never thought I would be one of "those moms" who has a hard time being away from her.  We have been incredibly lucky to have both of our parents close by.  Not only does my mom watch Samantha while we work but both of our parents watch Samantha on a regular basis.  In fact, Samantha is nearing 2.5 years old and we have paid a babysitter twice.  That's right...two times.  Samantha never even saw the babysitter those two times because the babysitter came after we had put her to bed.  This is not just a huge benefit in cost savings but it means that Samantha is always with someone who really, really loves her.  This means the world to me.

A few months ago, my mom joined a program at church that meets every Wednesday for a few hours and has a preschool program.  I keep meaning to write about this but I'm a little embarrassed at my own progress.  The first time I dropped her off, they sort of whisked her away so that I couldn't draw out the goodbye process.  I went to my car and cried.  Samantha has loved the program, she announced early on that she was a big girl and would not cry when she went to class.  She plays with the other kids, reads stories, does art and tells us all about it.  But, no matter how many times I drop her off there I still feel a little sick when I have to leave.  I'm the weird mom who lingers in the hall and peeks in to make sure she is doing alright. Guess what? She is always fine.  I guess the good news is I do it.  I don't like it but I do let her go.

I went and toured a preschool last week where Samantha will likely go for a few mornings starting this summer.  It was very nice and had amazing play rooms and theaters and gym equipment.  Samantha didn't even come with me but I'll admit I felt overwhelmed thinking about having to leave her there.  I'm having visions of being this crazy mom crying every day as she goes to high school!  I'm curious if I'll do better with baby number two or if I'll always struggle with this.

Clockwork

Just as I entered the third trimester, I began to feel much more uncomfortable.  At the gym I somehow did something to myself that made me feel like I had cracked the center of my pelvic bone, making most movements and even sitting, painful.  I have terrible heartburn, I can't sleep, I'm grouchy and the list goes on.  Overall, I believe it is a warning to me to take it easy and listen to my body, and this sweet baby.  She by the way, is a wild kicker like her sister was, although I don't remember Samantha moving and kicking so much while I attempt to sleep. 

We spent last weekend clearing out space and bringing out baby gear to prepare for the new baby.  I've heard people joke that the best decorated room in every young couple's house is the bedroom for their first child.  So much planning and anticipation goes into the bedroom layout, paint and furniture.  I'm not the most crafty person but I'm trying to be very sensitive to giving the second baby as much creativity as I can muster so Dave and I spent time with an art project for the baby's room.  Photos to come soon.

We also went shopping for a big girl bed for Samantha which we will move her into after Thanksgiving.   Busy times around here!  Samantha is very grown up these days and continues to crack us up with the things she says.  As we were eating dinner at Josh's house this week, she exclaimed "this is delicious!" And, yes you are all right, the child who I was worried would never talk, chatters about non-stop these days.  She sings, she tells stories and I have to remind her not to stay up too late reading out loud to herself in her crib. 

Halloween

We had a fun Halloween complete with pumpkin carving, decorations and trick or treating which Samantha loved.  I am excited about the upcoming holiday season because more than anything, Samantha admired all the Halloween decorations she saw.  As we were driving in my parent's neighborhood or even just looking around our house she would point out scarecrows, bats, ghosts or pumpkins and would gleefully exclaim "Look at those cute decorations!"

She was definitely the cutest fairy I saw.  You can see all of our Halloween additions here.  As for me, I was a baker for Halloween with my "bun in the oven".  

Be Kind

We are hiring like crazy at Return Path and we have an extensive interview process which means I have been involved with quite a few interviews lately.  One of the stories I always tell people who are interviewing who ask me about Return Path is about our CEO, Matt Blumberg.  

This is one of those stories that I'm sure has morphed over time in my head but the way I remember it, it was shortly after I started at Return Path, almost six years ago.  I attended an internal time management training that Matt led.  I could write a whole separate blog post about how that training has helped to make me organized and anal retentive about my inbox but that is for another day.  

In addition to maintaining a clear focus on work and immediate actions that need to be taken in your work life, Matt discussed using the same system for personal goals and aspirations.  I'm sure he uses a different system now, but at the time it was an excel spreadsheet where all of his tasks were listed in different worksheets and reviewed regularly based on type.  He quickly scrolled through his different worksheets and in his personal spreadsheet at the top of the spreadsheet, in bold, said "BE KIND".

I think about this often.  First, I'm proud that I work for a company who is led by someone who values the importance of being kind in everything he does.  There are not many people like that and certainly few companies that focus on kindness.  Secondly, I use it for myself as a daily reminder that the speed of life, busy schedules, appointments, work load, etc. is no excuse to forget simple acts of kindness.  

There's the old saying -  Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. It takes money to make money or if you want to have a friend, be a friend. If you want to be valued, value others more and if you want to be treated with kindness you must be kind to others.  There is a spiritual principal of the Universe that says to give what you would like to receive. That's why I love the company I work for and I do my best to focus on kindness - it isn't always easy but with a little kind and gracious living, I can truly enjoy every day more. 

Finally New Photos

You may think I've lost interest in taking photos of Samantha.  The reality is that my camera has been on the fritz for the past few months, it is hit or miss to get it to turn on.  I'm hoping that I get a new one for Christmas.  I have gotten it to work occasionally in the past few weeks so you can see for yourself here how adorable she is.

I think she is looking a lot like her Daddy lately...

In other news, I am 22 weeks along and getting big.  I'm still working out and have had a lot of energy.  Mainly I feel great in the process of working out/running and then can barely move the day after.

Mommy Do It

Samantha is in a serious Mommy phase right now.  Of course when I am pregnant and especially worn out, it is a constant "Mommy take me out of car seat" or "Mommy read me books" or "Mommy change diaper" - Mommy must do it all.  Although I am tired, I will admit that I love that she wants me close.  I figure I should soak this up as it won't be long until she is a teenager, slamming doors and telling me to get lost.

Dave is an especially good sport because usually when she proclaims her Mommy preference it is tied with a "No, not Daddy, Mommy do it!". I know she is two, but sometimes she is downright hurtful.  I would have a hard time with it but Dave takes it in stride.   The other night when Sammy threw a big Mommy fit before bed I explained that she had hurt Daddy's feelings and that she should apologize.  I have to say that it was incredibly adorable as she opened the door, walked down the hallway and said "Daddy...I sorry".  It's truly amazing how she is really soaking it all in these days.

I'm in Washington D.C. for work this week so Samantha and Daddy are having some good bonding time - Mommy free. 

I Almost Forgot but I'm Pregnant

19 weeks pregnant, I'm already bigger!

I'm more than half way through this pregnancy and up to this point it has been very different than my pregnancy with Samantha. 

One of my first blog posts ever was "Proceed with Caution" and described the crying, irrational behavior, grouchiness and anger I was experiencing in my pregnancy.  If anything, this pregnancy has given me a sense of calm and serenity.  I'm feeling stable and I don't sweat the small stuff.  Getting pregnant has helped once again give me perspective on what is truly important and I feel blessed to be pregnant, to have a healthy family and an incredible support system with our immediate families and friends close by. 

I am getting nice and round like last time and I'm once again loving cookies and cream ice cream so it isn't all brand new.  In the past few weeks I have started feeling some strong kicks, even some jabs to wake me up in the night so we have another active baby in there. 

We went to my 20 week ultrasound today and got confirmation on the gender (not that we really needed it!) and this growing girl inside me is looking perfect. 

Delightful

I've always considered myself a baby person.  I love the way babies smell, how warm and snugly they are and all of their tiny parts.  Honestly, I was worried I would lose interest in kids once they passed the baby stage and entered into toddlerdom.  I have been so pleasantly surprised at how much fun I am having with Samantha these days. 

I know that I joke sometimes about her being bossy or obstinate but I have to point out now that she is also genuinely sweet. She is always hugging me and showing affection.  After I sneeze she now says to me "Bless you Mom" and the other day when we were out shopping she said to me "Mommy is so cute" - what's not to love about that?

Samantha loves her babies too.  Her favorite is Daisy, followed closely by Sue and then Nancy.  Wherever we go, the babies all come along as well.  If one of them is missing there is a bit of hysteria with a "Where's Sue?" or a "I need Daisy".  After she slipped and dropped her baby I heard her say  "Goodness gracious Daisy!". In the mornings when we go wake her up (yes, we have to wake her up or she would sleep until 9 am) she rolls over, smiles and says to us "Still sleeping" or "I'm sleeping a little more with Daisy and Sue".    

I stop in my tracks all the time and think to myself "I love being her mom".  

Sweet Love

We officially made it through our wedding stint of 5 weddings in 7 weeks.  I danced my way through each one and gradually got larger and larger as each wedding approached.  I have been looking back on my blog posts from when I was pregnant with Samantha and it seems that I really popped right around 17-20 weeks.  Looks as though the same has applied to this pregnancy.  As my mom says, I was gone for three days in Omaha last weekend and came back twice as big!

I recognize this is more of a "mom" blog but after all of these weddings I wanted to share some really unique ideas and special touches that stood out for me on my wedding tour of 2010.

1. Creative chuppahs: In Jewish tradition, the couple marries under a chuppah, a canopy made of cloth that is held by four posts which symbolizes the home the couple will build together.  For Molly and Brian's wedding, my mother in law worked tirelessly to include the entire wedding party and family to make them a custom chuppah.  Friends and family members were each given a cloth square to personalize with thoughts, memories and photos of the couple.  The squares were then sewn together to create a beautiful quilt that hung above them during their wedding and will also be an incredible keepsake.  This past weekend at Dave's cousin Annie's wedding, their chuppah was made using material from both the bride and groom's mother's wedding dresses.  It had wedding photos of their family members on their wedding days sewn in.  I love seeing pieces of tradition and family woven into the wedding ceremony.
2. Fingerprint tree: Frequently at weddings, couples have a photo or guest book for friends and family to sign as they come into the reception as a keepsake of who attended.  At our friends Eric and Michelle's wedding they had a beautiful painting of the trunk of tree with many branches.  As you walked into their reception, they had orange, green and yellow ink pads where guests were asked to make leaves with their thumb prints on the painting.  Then, each guest wrote their name or initials on their leaf.  The end result was a gorgeous piece of art that they could hang in their house with all the leaves of loved ones. 
3. Storytelling tables: Gone are the days where you pick up your seating assignment for the wedding and go to a numbered table.  This year, a fun trend was to have storytelling tables.  At a wedding in Steamboat for Rob and Tanya, each table was location where they had gone on a trip.  As you went to your "Costa Rica" or "Moab" table there was a photo of them on their vacation with a cute story about where they went and why it was special.   When we went to Portland for the wedding of Nic and Jenny, each table was a race or marathon that one of them had run, quite impressive and a fun way to get to know the couple even better. 
4. Loved Ones Pins: At Annie and Todd's wedding this past weekend in Omaha, the brides mother, the talented Aunt Patty, created these tiny photo frames with pictures of loved ones who have passed away.  Then, those tiny photos were pinned into the bride's bouquet and in the lapel of the groom, keeping loved ones close even though they are no longer with us.  I will try to find a photo of this because my description doesn't do justice to what a sweet remembrance it was.
5. Delicious treats: I am not a huge fan of sweets but I do admire the display and decoration of desserts. I loved our wedding cake but not because I ate any of it, but because it was a beautiful sight!  At the weddings this year there was a wide assortment of incredible displays of cake, cupcakes, donuts and treats.  From a tasting perspective I enjoyed the originality at Nic and Jenny's wedding where they had scrumptious donuts from the infamous Voodoo Donuts in Portland (I love donuts!). At Sara and Mike's wedding in Boulder, our friend Deirdre made the assortment of treats and impressive cake as a gift to the couple. I appreciate when our friends make their day special while at the same time featuring special talents of friends.  Can you believe Deirdre made the whole display shown above?! 

Just Like DiMaggio

My father-in-law Jim thinks that my family should aim to have as many girls in a row as Joe DiMaggio had hits.  DiMaggio of course is best known for his 56-game hitting streak (May 15–July 16, 1941), a record that still stands. As I have explained, this new baby will be #23, meaning we are getting close to half of  the DiMaggio record!

And for those of you who doubted me, I have created a diagram of the long line of Allen ladies below!

Click on image to enlarge graph

Pay Up Grandma

Today, as my data was being transferred to a new computer at work, my mom convinced me we should sneak to Denver and hit up the 3D ultrasound office where they promised we could do a gender test at 15-16 weeks.  Sure enough, they were able to get a very clear picture of our healthy baby moving around, waving a bit and then revealing her gender.

Yes, that's right, it's ANOTHER girl!

If my count is correct, this baby will be the 23rd consecutive girl born on my Mom's side of the family since my Papa and his brother.  I'm going to do an official list and do a bit of PR to see what kind of coverage this gets.  Surely it's a world record right? 

I am extremely excited for another girl.  I already know I love having a girl, it certainly makes it easy with a fully stocked wardrobe and I think it will be special for Samantha to have a sister.  Dave will have his hands full with his Brantz girls, but he is up for the challenge (of all three of us!).

Dismissed

We have officially been dropped from the speech therapy program that Samantha was in.  This is wonderful news and Samantha has been excelling with her speech and chatting away.  Not only that, but our speech therapist Janine feels that her pronunciation is excellent and she has surpassed milestones expected  for an average two year old by adding strings of words together. Janine came for the last time on Monday and it was certainly bittersweet.  I can't say enough good things about Janine, the skills she taught us, and the Dayspring program in general.   I also give so much credit to my mom for consistently taking Samantha to all the classes and activities through the program that encouraged her development. 

With new strides in speech, means that Samantha has begun to say some really hilarious stuff.  About a week ago, Samantha was putting up quite a fight at bedtime.  Dave went in to her room to see if he could get her to sleep and the next morning when I was getting her up I asked her why she was so upset the night before.  She told me "Dad singing song, Dad singing Stewball.  No more Stewball."  I have talked about the importance of Stewball here, but we've never talked about it with Samantha.  Apparently she associates that song with bed time now. 

She also told my mom impatiently the other day "Hold on a second!" as she pointed her finger at her.  Then, last night I was reading her a book before bed and I yelled to the other room "Dave, could you bring us a shake?" and Samantha repeated with a shout "DAVE! Bring shake!"

Hard Worker

We just finished our third consecutive wedding weekend.  We have one weekend off and then we will back at it.  I am proud to say at that last two weddings I was still on the dance floor for the final song, not bad for a pregnant lady right?  And more importantly, Samantha had another hugely successful stint as flower girl at Sara and Mike's wedding.

During the rehearsal I must say I was quite concerned about how she would do.  She refused to walk down the makeshift aisle, would not hold hands with the other flower girl or ring bearers, was unbearably clingy to me and generally was not going to participate in anything.

This little girl is full of surprises.  At the actual wedding, here she came rounding the corner with a big smile,  holding hands with the ring bearers (who could blame her, they are cute!).  All four of the kids got on to the stage but it was Samantha was stayed, making sure that she had thrown every last flower.  Before exiting the stage she pulled her dress over her head and she proceeded to chatter through the entire ceremony, yelling repeatedly "Hi Mom!".  As my father in law commented at the end of the wedding "Remember when we were in a rush for her to talk?".   

Serious about her duties

Hard at work spreading her flowers before the bride arrives

Another Brantz Baby on Board

Yes, we are expecting another addition to our little family.  My due date is Valentine's Day, 2011 so I am 12 weeks along.  I have been feeling pretty good.  I was extremely tired in the beginning but I am starting to get some energy back.  Overall I feel MUCH more stable than last time.  No emotional breakdowns or out of the blue crying which is nice for me and a big relief for Dave. 

As we told our doctor, we had "talked about planning", however everything happened very quickly this time around.  I feel like I was just getting Dave use to the idea of trying to get pregnant when I then had to tell him that I was pregnant - voila! 

And, for those of you wondering if that girl streak was ever broken...it has not been.  I wrote during my last pregnancy how Samantha would be girl number 19 in a long line of girls born without a single boy since my Grandpa and his brother.  The count is now up to 22 girls total.  My Grandma is sure this baby is a boy and I believe she is willing to take a bet for any willing participants. 

Samantha's Secret

Love is in the Air

I keep saying that I am going to make a list of all of the weddings that Dave and I have attended.  I swear it must now be close to 4,729.  Just when I think every last one of our friends has been married off, we have another year like this with 8-10 weddings.  This weekend begins our 5 weddings in 7 weeks stint. 

Don't get me wrong, I still find weddings to be inspirational and magical.  It is fun to see what everyone decides to do to make their special day unique.  Next weekend our dear friends Sara and Mike will be getting married, I am a bridesmaid, Samantha will be a flower girl and Dave will be officiating.  It is truly a family affair honoring their love and commitment.  

Did you know Dave officiates weddings? He will be officiating his 3rd and 4th weddings in the next few weeks.  I'm thinking next wedding season we will create a business and start charging for our involvement. 

Life is a Sum of All Your Choices

I've always been taught that life is all about choices.  If you aren't happy, if you want to take on a new challenge or if you faced with a dilemma, there are always a variety of choices available and you are in control of making the choice.

I read an interesting blog post yesterday about David Sedaris' Four Burners Theory.  The idea is that the four burners represent your family, your friends, your health and your work.  According to the theory, in order to be successful you have to cut off one of your burners. 

The idea is not that you can’t have all four, even at once: it’s that you can’t have an exceptional level of all four at once. You cannot put in the time required to raise children properly and nurture outstanding friendships of depth and be an elite athlete and win the Nobel prize in chemistry. Because to be outstanding at any one thing requires an outstanding level of focus on that thing.

Definitely an interesting thing to ponder.  I can't quite get this idea out of my head.  I've been doing my best to have exceptional levels of all four.  I do my best to be an encouraging and supportive mother, wife, daughter and sister.  I exercise and watch what I eat, try to spend time in meditation doing yoga. I work hard trying to come up with innovative ways to do my job and move the business forward.  And for Dave and I, our friendships remain at the center of our lives.  All four are certainly important to me.  I'd like to think that I have support in each area to make it all possible.  But perhaps trying to "have it all" is unrealistic. 

Don't Tell Uncle Brian

In this video, Samantha talks dogs and sports. 


You can also see photos of her fantastic 2nd birthday party here.  She had so much fun!

I Get It

On the fourth of July, I had a "moment" that took me back to my sophomore year of college.  That wild year I turned 20, I lived in a big house on The Hill in Boulder with my best friend Ryan and four boys.  There was never a dull moment in the house, we were once even shown on an MTV show about underage parties on college campuses.  After a particularly raucous party I was sitting on our front porch the next afternoon when I saw a determined woman leave her house from across the street.  She was on a mission and I was her target.  Of course this was probably the only time throughout the entire year that I was the only person at the house so I was the sole recipient of her angry tirade.  She did not hold back and boy did she yell!  She told me that next time we have a party and wake her two kids up at 2 am, we would be getting a wake up call of our own when her kids wake up at their regular time of 6 am. For the rest of the year I was petrified of her.

Flash forward to this year.  Samantha and I went home from a 4th of July party at Josh's house and left Dave to continue the celebration.  It was pouring rain so we decided not to keep Samantha up for fireworks as we had originally planned.  I put Samantha to bed and was enjoying a mellow night at home reading my book.  Fireworks make our dog insane and every noise he heard set him off into a barking frenzy.  I tried everything, turned on the TV, locked him in our room but nothing worked. And, throughout it all I called to yell at Dave about all the barking.   Then, around 10:30 pm I could hear more and more fireworks being shot right outside of our window.   I knew I didn't have much time before all the barking woke Samantha.

I walked outside to see a whole crew of people shooting off fireworks one after another in our street.  As I was debating whether to go give them a talking to or to call the police, Dave saved the day and pulled up to take the dogs back to the party with him.  As I got back into bed with my book,  I thought of that woman across the street yelling at me 12 years ago, I understand now that being protective of your children makes even the most calm people crazy.

Approaching Two

Hard to believe but Samantha Lee will be turning two this Saturday.  She is officially a little chatter box these days and went from having about 40 words to over 100.  She is putting words together and saying things like "Oh gosh Mom", "Go to park now"  and "Javie no barking!", as I have said before, it is clear that she takes after her Tia Molly in the bossy realm. Speaking of Tia Molly, how cute is the Flamenco outfit she got Samantha from Spain in the photo here?

I don't like to call her terrible but she is showing other signs of her age as well.  She uses the word no rather frequently along with a hand in front of the face gesture indicating to talk to the hand.  She has some intermittent tantrums along with fake crying.  The other day she was throwing a real fit, crying on the floor of her room, she then came running out to where we were in the living room screaming, stopped and said "All Done!" and suddenly stopped her crying. 

We are planning a fun party on Saturday complete with a bouncy castle, pizza and kiddie pools.  Having a birthday that falls so close to a holiday means many of her friends are out of town but because she is our daughter I know that she will figure out how to have a fantastic time. New photos can be found here. 

Backtrack

Before we had the passport fiasco, our trip to Spain and Samantha's visit to Omaha, we had Memorial Day weekend.  It was one of the best.  Not only did my best friend Ryan come to town with her daughter Sophia but our close friends Devin and Carina came from San Francisco with their daughter Bailey. 

Samantha was obsessed with Sophia.  I have never seen her fall in love with anyone so quickly.  They were fast friends and Sophia was so sweet with Samantha.  They ran around. went to the park, played with dolls and just had so much fun together.   

We got everyone who was visiting together with everyone who was local and I felt really fortunate to have so many people that I love in the same place.  We all ran the Bolder Boulder, had BBQs together and let our kids play together.  All of our special girls are pictured here.  It was bittersweet because in the end everyone went home, I wish we were close all the time.  You can see the latest photos of Samantha along with some great Memorial Day pictures here.

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

We are back from Barcelona and of the many things I learned while I was away, the most important was that 8 days is too long for me to be away from Samantha.  Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed myself. Dave and I took in all the sights and sounds of Barcelona, then I kept busy with work and the conference that I was attending.  But, after about the fifth day I had this pain in the pit of my stomach missing my baby girl.

Both Dave and I did a lot of traveling in college but times have changed.  Gone are the days that you line up to sit at an internet cafe for an hour.  We were both struck by how the internet has changed things.  We skyped with Samantha from our hotel room, I got last minute hotel rates on hotwire (for Barcelona!),  I kept in touch with my coworkers at the conference via email and text messages and for the most part I didn't get too far behind in my work because I was connected the entire time.  Other things caught me by surprise too like how every taxi driver had a tom tom or garmin to direct the route and before heading out on our daily adventures I could get online to see when restaurants or exhibits were open. 

Samantha had a fabulous time going to Omaha for the week with her Grammy and visiting all of her cousins and relatives there.  There is a really clear difference in how confident she is after going, especially with other kids.  She does not run to her room for cover when people are at our house and she has officially started a word explosion.   Samantha has yet to say Grandma and my mom was concerned she would come back saying "Aunt Patty" who she stayed with.  We were all at a get together on Saturday and my mom said "Well at least I haven't heard her say Aunt Pat" to which Samantha responded "Aunt Pat.....! Aunt Pat, Aunt Pat, Aunt Patty!" 

Beautiful Barcelona

I realize I can be quite dramatic.  In my last post, the depression of things not working out just right led me to neglect telling you a few things.  First, I speak Spanish.  Second, I did a special project in college all about Gaudi, the famous Spanish architect.  I have been dying to see La Sagrada Familia, La Pedrera and Parc Guell for ages and they are all in Barcelona. In other words, I'm not helpless and the situation is not horrible.

So, here I am in Barcelona.  The sun is shining and Dave worked out all his passport issues and will be here in the morning.  When I arrived early this morning my hotel room wasn't ready so I walked to La Sagrada Familia.  It was even more incredible, gigantic and awe inspiring than I imagined.  Just when you think you have seen it's entirety, you turn the corner and see more massive towers, intricate stone carvings and bizarre peaks.  It was amazing.  Then I sat and had cafe con leche and read my book at a magical little European cafe.  Barcelona reminds me a lot of a Buenos Aires and NYC fusion. 

Now I'm off to enjoy the sunshine and some sangria.  Reading in my Spain book on the plane I realized, I needed more time in Barcelona to do the things I wanted to do.  It all works out in the end!

 

Another Deleted Blog Post

I had this very cheery blog post up earlier today.  It was all about how we just enjoyed a wonderful Memorial Day weekend with dear friends and that tomorrow Dave and I were heading to Spain.  Taking a few extra days before a work conference I am attending to head to the beach and enjoy a vacation together for the first time we have traveled just the two of us since our honeymoon.

My bags were packed and Dave was buzzing around adding his things to the suitcases when he came into the living room to tell me he had just looked at his passport and it was expired.  Expired...in November 2009.  

Tomorrow I am off to Barcelona alone.  Dave is going to do his best to get a new passport, a new plane ticket and meet me eventually but it won't be for a few days even in the best case scenario.  Lately I have felt like the the ball is just not in my court.  

All Blissed Out

I've had a rough couple of weeks.  It probably wouldn't be a good idea to go into the details but I've been struggling with feeling extremely hurt and angry.  Nobody likes to feel like that and I've been using this blog to write angry blog posts in the middle of the night, posting them and removing them in the morning.  Crazy? A little bit, but it helped.  The weather here has coincided with my mood and it has been gloomy, dark and rainy.

Yesterday the sun came out and I had a fantastic day that I was appreciative of.   I am always reminded to keep things in perspective.  Sometimes not every piece of my life is the way I want it but I really have a lot to be thankful for.  My day included playing with Samantha in the sunshine, a massage, Scrabble with Dave on the back porch, a run, a bike ride to yoga class and then dinner with good friends.

As I was walking out of my hot yoga class the instructor said "Wow, you look all blissed out!".  She was right.  My mother in law got me the best bike for my birthday and I hopped on and rang my cute bell all the way home.  Life is good.

Mexican Alphabet

As I mentioned, Samantha loves Mexican food just as much as the rest of us.  She eats spicy salsa and has now started to request "rice and beans".  This video is from our latest Thursday night girls night at El Rey, a small little neighborhood restaurant.  She pointed out the letters to me on the chair and I got the camera out.  I thought her obsession with letters and the alphabet in general was fairly normal for her age but I have been told this is not true from her speech therapist.  I guess it is more of a 3 year old milestone.  This shows that she can identify letters outside of her alphabet book.  Pretty darn cute if I do say so myself. 

Look Who's Talking!

Back in March, when we had Samantha evaluated for speech therapy, they asked me to set some goals for what I would like to see happen after 6 months.  Talking over some norms with the speech experts, I set a goal that Samantha would have 30 words by August.  I also hoped that she would begin to play along side peers and not be so scared of social interactions.

I have been extremely impressed with the program that Samantha is in.  I mentioned how wonderful Samantha's speech therapist Janine is.  She has shown us some very helpful strategies to encourage Samantha to talk.  Simple things like when we are reading books or singing songs that Samantha is familiar with, we will stop and let her fill in the word.  I was amazed that Samantha could do it for many rhymes, books and songs.   In doing that we also learned that she can identify many letters in the alphabet.  We also do exercises with mimicking and making fun noises.  Working with Janine for just over a month, Samantha now has over 20 words. I admit the term "talking" is a stretch, but we are getting there!

The other incredible piece of the program which has been great for us is their community calendar of events.  Through the Dayspring program, they have activities at Gymboree, gymnastics centers, farms, museums, etc.  Each week there are about 3-5 structured classes for the kids in the program led by occupational therapists.  These have really helped Samantha feel comfortable around other kids in a safe environment and they are fun!  This week, my mom was out of town visiting family in Oklahoma.  I have loved taking Samantha to the activities and watching how far she has come, it is amazing.

I don't expect that she will ever be the most chatty kid around but I love seeing her break out of her shell, express herself and have a good time doing it.

No Way Jose

I figure it was inevitable.  Our baby who said "yes" long before "no" has now entered the "NO" phase.  It started out with a head shake and lately no matter what you ask her, her reply is no.

On Saturdays in April, Samantha has been taking a swim class with Dave.  I go along each week because Samantha's pure enjoyment is priceless.  She has the biggest grin ear to ear the entire class.  Then, every week when she gets out of the water I ask her if she had fun at swim class and she replies with an adamant no. 

First, this is what she looks like for most of the class.  She is ecstatic!

This is after the class, you can't quite hear but I ask her "Samantha, did you have fun at your swim class?"

Date Night

This month Dave is taking pottery class every Thursday evening with our friend Sara.  He started doing pottery in high school and has since found great enjoyment doing pottery at this old school house/pottery lab up on the Hill in Boulder. 

This has left Samantha and I alone every Thursday evening and so far, we have used the opportunity to dine out together.  I love this for many reasons.  I love special mother/daughter time with her and it is exciting to me that she is mature enough to sit calmly and enjoy a meal out with me, she is very good with utensils so she doesn't make a mess and of course I appreciate that she loves Mexican food as much as I do. She absolutely loves chips and salsa and people always stop to comment on her dipping skills.  In fact, when we are driving back from work/Grandma's house and I ask if she would like to eat rice, beans, chips and salsa for dinner she begins to giggle excitedly and proclaim "YES!"

Confessions of a Boulderite

I tried to pretend for awhile on this blog that I am not a "typical" Boulderite.  But by now, if you have been reading, you know that I exercise regularly, recycle, I breastfed Samantha until after her first birthday, my husband drives a Subaru and I did mom and baby yoga. I am Boulder!

I have recently become quite obsessed with yoga.  Hot Core Power Yoga to be exact.  This is yoga you do in a room that is about 100 degrees.  I don't know what it is but it is the only exercise that I have ever done in my life that I truly enjoy while I'm doing it.  It is also the only thing I've ever done that my mind is calm the entire time.  Once I am done, I feel like I just got a massage.  If only running could do that!

This week I'm really turning up the notch of my Boulder ways.  Tonight I will be attending an Evening of Meditation and Wisdom with Sri Sri Ravi Shankar.  I have seen him in the past, actually while I studied in Costa Rica.  Tonight they are promising "a unique opportunity to sit with Sri Sri, experience deep meditation, gain insights into relationships and soak in wisdom. Plus, he is adorable and I love saying his name...just try it.

Then on Saturday, I will be attending a Know and Flow workshop at the yoga studio.  It's going to be a yoga and astrology day where we do two sets of yoga and in between we have our astrological charts read.  This is pretty hokie, even for me.  Makes me giggle every time I think of it, but I'm excited to see what it's all about!

I will share any profound wisdom and insights I learn this week!

Lucky

I just spent a fabulous weekend away in Arizona with three dear friends.  We had a "just for the fun of it" trip to Scottsdale and stayed at the Phoenician Hotel and Spa.  It is good for the soul to be with wonderful friends and the massages, spa time, yoga, pool lounging, fantastic meals and meditation didn't hurt either!  I am so grateful to have special friends and also lucky to have a husband that I love and trust to stay at home and have fun with Samantha.  They went to swim class, a party at the scuba shop and to Pearl Street to play.  Everyone wins!

More Today Than Ever

About a year ago I read an incredibly funny and poignant book, I'd Trade My Husband for a Housekeeper.  When I read it, I think it hit a little too close to home to write about on this blog.  Literally, every other page of the book is dog eared. 

Most of the book talks about  how women today start out with an unrealistic vision of what married life would look like, particularly married life with kids. We tend to paint a very rosy picture of motherhood and marriage to each other.  Then, we are unhappy because we have this extreme sense of disappointment when in our own lives, things aren't so picture perfect.

I can remember clearly sitting in the hospital with my friend Sara.  I was post C-section, sore, tired and emotional and Sara said to me "Do you just love Dave so much more now?"  What? Um...no.  I didn't feel so much more in love with him after giving birth.  Labor, delivery, pain did not equal an overwhelming love for my husband. 

From the book:
People are actually less happy today than in the prior generation.  The first problem is expectations.  Today we expect our  partner to be everything to us.  Our workout partner, our coach, our lover, our friend.  The next problem, is that we tend to enter into marriage with ludicrously overblown notions of what it will be like.  We think we'll have perfect communication; star-aligned value systems; great sex after kids; the perfect house; a long lasting, healthy, best friendship marriage...the list goes on and on.  And while that's all really nice, we need to get those visions out of our heads and start talking realistically about marriage if we want to be happy in it.  Marriage and motherhood are difficult-but they can also be magical and worthwhile.  Counter-intuitive as it may seem, we've got to start acknowledging real marriage--flawed marriage-if we want to learn to enjoy the marriages we've got.  

I think a lot of people told me about how wonderful marriage and motherhood would be, and don't get me wrong, it is.  I think once I realized how hard it can also be, and was okay with that, I started to enjoy it a lot more.  I can honestly say today that I do love Dave more than ever.  Took a little longer than I imagined (ha!) and we aren't perfect, but I think we are doing pretty damn good.  He is a wonderful father, I love watching him play with Samantha. He is an amazing husband, somehow he manages to love me with all my craziness.   I believe life is all about choices.  And, we choose to love each other, and our ups and downs every day.

Performance Review

Word on the streets is that there is a war raging between stay at home moms and working moms.  Everyone is set on defending their choices.  I must say that I couldn't be happier to work, although I have quite an ideal work situation being in the office a few days a week and working from home (and close to Samantha) for the other days.  I don't think it is right or wrong to work or stay at home.  More than anything, I feel like you make choices that are right for you and you do what you have to do. 

All of that being said, I just had a great performance review.  I wrote last year how I dread these yearly reviews.  But, this year was great!  I had a lot of positive feedback and it was clear that the areas I am focused on and trying to improve upon have been successful.  Of course there is always room for improvement but it is nice to see that others are taking note of my progress.  I have hit my stride at work and I'm feeling like an old dog can learn new tricks!

After my review I got to thinking of how rewarding it was to get in writing that people appreciate the work I am doing and that I am taking feedback I have gotten and making improvements.  I was also reminded of what a thankless job being a stay at home mom or a caretaker can be.  

I wanted to take note of what an amazing job my mom is doing with Samantha.  It sure makes it easier for me to have a fullfilling career when I know Samantha is so well taken care of.  My mom plays with Samantha, encourages her, reads to her and demonstrates her love every day of the week.  Over the past few weeks my mom has been very focused on the areas that the speech therapist has recommended and you can see the progress Samantha is making already.  In addition, my mom has been taking Samantha to activity classes and getting her more comfortable with other kids.  From what I hear, every time she goes she is more social and participating with the group.  Way to go, Grandma gets an A+ on her performance review!

Speech Therapy

This was Samantha's first week of speech therapy.  I was very curious to see what the therapist would be like, the activities she would do with Samantha and if Samantha would warm up to her at all.  I am happy to report that it was wonderful.  Janine, the therapist, has been working with kids forever and was so gentle and warm with Samantha.  Samantha was playing with her after the first ten minutes which is rare these days.  We all really liked her (me, my mom and Samantha). 

The first session was mainly spent getting to know each other and discussing our concerns.  We talked about some of the activities we would be doing each week. The therapist just kept raving about how smart and introspective Samantha was which of course we liked.  Samantha did some of the smart things she always does.  For example, Janine said we would read books like "Goodnight Moon" that Samantha was familiar with.  Samantha perked up, ran into her bedroom and returned with that book. 

Janine told us that she wasn't convinced Samantha had a delay.  Honestly, I thought she was going to end by saying she wouldn't be coming back.  Fortunately, she isn't all that concerned and she's coming next week! 

What More Could I Need?

Life is an Orchestra

Someday you should ask me about my host family in Costa Rica.  What an adventure it was to live with them.  My host mom was a real character.  We would sit around, drink coffee and smoke cigarettes for hours on end and she would give me her take on life along with all sorts of colorful analogies.  I kept saying I would write down all of her classic advice and of course I never did but a few things have stuck with me. 

She told me once to think of all the pieces of my life as an instrument.  You have to work on each one, keep practicing and when you have things in a good place, your life will sound like a beautiful orchestra.  One off instrument can cause huge disruptions to the overall synergy so you can't let anything slip or the music will start screeching and life won't sound the way you intended.  I have always wanted to live inside of a musical and I love thinking of this. 

Lately I feel like I have all the instruments in order, playing a beautiful song to the story of my life.  I have been feeling an occasional guilt because life feels so good, I am really happy and I don't know that I want to have another baby.  I have been working out a lot, going to yoga, going out to dinner with girlfriends, taking trips for work and fun.  Samantha is so fun, I feel like she and Dave are all that I need.  The more time that goes by, I am not sure I ever want to be pregnant, waking in the night, breastfeeding, or doing the whole baby thing again. Selfish yes, but honest as well.   

Resemblances

Lately, I've been feeling like Samantha doesn't look much like me or Dave.  Or rather, she looks like a combination of people, mainly Dave's sister Molly and Dave's Dad.

Earlier this week I found an email my Grandma sent to me when I was about oh 12 weeks pregnant.  The email said: This is what baby Sam will look like but he will have dark, curly hair.

I have to admit I do see the resemblance. And, although Sam is a girl, she does look a bit like this with dark, curly hair.

I finally got my camera working again so you can see the latest photos of our ridiculously cute daughter here. 

Finding the Lessons

Thanks to all of you who have written, called, texted, etc.  We have such a wonderful support system in our lives.  We are doing well, looking forward to getting Samantha started with her speech therapy.  Yes, I had mixed emotions in the beginning.  You know I am a sucker to feeling guilty as it is, it is hard not to blame myself for any delay she is having.

But, it is a good lesson for me in many ways.  First, as a parent, you can't control every milestone or situation that your child goes through.  You do your best and support your children.  Next, no child can be perfect at everything.  There is a fine line between encouraging your child and being a control freak.  She needs some extra help on something, not a big deal.  The last thing I have learned is to keep it all in perspective.  This is a minor hiccup, nothing serious.  Samantha is a happy, healthy, intelligent and beautiful child.  She lights up every day for us.  And, as my Grandma says, every girl in our family has gotten into trouble at school for talking too much, eventually I'm sure I'll be wondering why I was in such a rush to get Samantha talking more!  

We went to a very fun birthday party yesterday for Samantha's friend Audrey who turned two.  Samantha ate pizza, played in the sandbox, ran around and even made some new friends.  You can see her here playing with a new friend and eating pizza with her boyfriend Norm.

Samantha's Evaluation

Today I took Samantha in for her speech evaluation.  Boulder County has an incredible program, Child Find, that is set up to identify children who are having difficulty in their development in certain areas and provide services to them when it is appropriate.  It is all free of cost.

We had an at home visit yesterday where we talked about some of our concerns.  Then, today Samantha and I went to their facilities that had an open room with lots of different toys to play with.  Then the evaluators/speech and child development experts sat behind a mirrored wall.  This way, Samantha could play at ease with me and they could observe unbeknown to her.

Later, they came out to discuss their findings with me.  They explained that Samantha was very advanced in her social, emotional and cognitive play.  She fed and rocked the baby doll, she put together puzzles, she followed two step directions and shook her head yes and no in response to requests I made.  She was also exceptional with her fine and gross motor skills, stacking blocks, manipulating toys, throwing the ball, etc.

However, they had concerns (like I have had) about her expressive language. While she does well with receptive language like pointing to pictures on request, following directions and pointing to body parts, she 
had difficulty making the sounds for the words she tried to use.  Most of the words she attempted to say were more like word approximations.  They do believe she has a significant delay in expressive speech and language and have recommended that we do speech therapy for her once a week.

I will write another post sometime soon about the range of emotions I am feeling with this.  The one very reassuring thing they covered with me is what a positive tool sign language is for her.  A LOT of people have blamed her speech delay on the signing she has learned and I have been feeling very guilty about it.  They explained that her speech delay has nothing to do with her use of signs.  Actually, all three of them said that was ridiculous.  She has difficulty making the noises she wants to make and being understood, the sign language has given her the only means she has to to communicate her needs.  They told me to continue to encourage the sign language.  Once she learns to say and be understood with words she will drop the signs.  They said again and again what a blessing it is that she knows so many signs.

Flower Girl

We just returned from Florida and the wedding was a huge success.  We had a fun filled weekend and Samantha was wonderful.  It is hard to travel, get off a nap schedule and be around a lot of new people but she did great.  On top of that, she has had a nasty cold for the past few weeks that we can't quite get rid of.  Now that I have that cold, I am even more sympathetic of how she has been feeling. 

The wedding was tons of fun and Samantha even walked down the aisle at the wedding and threw a few petals at the end.  She had a brief meltdown leading up to her flower girl duties and I was very worried she wouldn't do anything but be carried down the aisle but she pulled through just in time!  Of course I am biased but I believe she was the cutest flower girl ever.

Molly looked absolutely beautiful and it is always special when two people you love get married and you know it is a great match...not all weddings are like that!  They are a great couple and I'm proud to have them in my family.  You can see all the photos from the wedding weekend that everyone is compiling here. 

Oh, and I fit into my bridesmaid dress just fine - phew!

A Little More Uplifting!

I was asked to get something up that was a bit more encouraging than the "late talker" post. I have heard from many of you and have gotten all sorts of input after that post. Truthfully, I think she has been using more words already since we have been encouraging her more. We are still having her see a speech therapist in early March just to get an expert opinion.

Life is good! We have been busy around here and preparing for Molly and Brian's wedding in Tampa next week. I did not reach my 10 pound weight loss goal, it ended up being more like 3! But the dress fits and I plan to eat really well and workout all week before we leave. Samantha has been busily been practicing her flowergirl duties, and has been excelling. We will see how she does in front of 300 people.

We had a really wonderful Valentine's day and you can see our mini photo shoot here. Samantha is really growing and has been cracking us up conducting when music is played and climbing on top of everything. I am posting this particularly cute picture I took today, we are ready for some warmer Florida weather next week!

Late Talker

I've had a nagging concern about Samantha's speech development. She clearly understands what we say to her and can follow directions. Lately she has really taken to the sign language and I can tell me when she's hungry or thirsty and what she would like to eat with signs. But she hasn't been progressing with saying new words.

Yesterday at a Superbowl party we went to, there were about three other kids Samantha's age, all of them talking up a storm. I try not to be one of those "comparative" moms but the differences were impossible to ignore. Not only did these kids have many words but they were saying things clearly and even putting two or three words together.

I came home and called my mom to find out that she also had been growing worried about Samantha lately. I consulted my trusty "What to Expect the Toddler Years" book which said that at her age, with the amount of words she uses, she is now considered a late talker. For the most part everything the book said made me feel much better. Some kids simply wait to talk, it also said as children develop physically, sometime they are literally using their energy for things like kicking a ball or running rather than talking. Also, all the things they listed to encourage speech like reading books, singing, reading nursery rhymes, etc. are daily staples for us.

But, just to be sure, I'm going to call today to schedule an appointment to have a speech development analysis. Will keep you posted...

Animals in the Bath

For awhile Samantha went through a phase where she really disliked bath time. I can't exactly explain it but after our trip to Oklahoma and having fun sharing a bath with Lola, she has now decided she is obsessed with baths. She points at the bath throughout the day asking "Bath?" The only painful part is getting her out where she acts like we are torturing her.

Here's a video I took about a month ago of her in the bath doing her animal noises. Her Tia Molly thinks her dog impression is particularly funny because it sounds suspiciously just like the dog Samantha is most familiar with, our pug Javier. She has really gotten good with her sign language, I can barely keep up with all her signs. Video to come on that soon.

Slacking

Not sure what my problem has been, just not in the blogging mood I guess. We have been busy and I do have some updates to share.

Samantha had her 18 month check up which she absolutely hated. The doctor assured us that this is one of the worst ages for doctor's visits, she is already weary of strangers and strangers who poke and prod are even worse, she cried hysterically the entire time we were there. She continues to be perfectly average with her height (45%) and now weight (55%) and of course he head is giant and in the 97 percentile.

I went to South Beach for Molly's bachelorette party and while I had a great time in warmer weather, Samantha had a fun weekend with the guys. She hung out with Dad, Andrew and Josh, went to Pearl Street, ate well and shopped. Three men and a baby.

On MLK day, Samantha, Judy, Sara and I went to the Stock show. From very early on, Samantha has been in love with animals, particularly dogs. We thought she would love the petting farm and checking out the livestock. She started out great checking on a cow, sheep and a few pigs in stalls. Then as we were meandering through about 100 cages of chickens, turkeys, ducks, etc. a rooster started crowing very loudly and Samantha went into hysterics. It was pretty much downhill from there. Later in the week she saw a rooster on television and once again burst into tears. She will probably be scarred for life.

Going Public and the Bridesmaid Dress

I recently read that to help with weight loss goals, Doctor Oz suggests (among other things) going public with your dieting plans to keep yourself motivated and accountable to your goals. So, I'm telling all of you, my faithful blog readers about my goal: 10 lbs and a nice fit in a yellow bridesmaid dress.

Dave's sister Molly is getting married to Brian Auld on February 27th. I am honored to be a bridesmaid in the wedding and have a very cute, sassy, yellow bridesmaid dress to wear for the occasion. When I originally ordered the dress it was much too small so I returned it for the next size up. When it arrived and was still a bit tight to zip up, I decided to keep it and did a quick diet test in September to make sure I could successfully fit in the dress. I accomplished that goal but since then, I have been eating and drinking to my heart's content during the holidays.

Now, I have less than two months to reach my goal. I'll keep you posted on my progress.

Please Be Quiet!

I have realized over the course of the last year and a half that I have a sensitivity to loud noises. I have been trying to work this out in my head lately. I mean I was a cheerleader in high school, screaming things at the top of my lungs. I enjoy social settings where there is dancing and loud conversation. Come on, Sara Keane is one of my closest friends and she is the LOUDEST person on the planet. But, I also find great comfort and a strong need for quiet time.

I often refer to this as "Carly time". My dad blames this desire for alone/quiet time on the fact that I was an only child for 15 years. I am not the person who needs to have a partner to do errands with or someone to talk to 24/7. Samantha's naps and bedtime have become the perfect outlet for me to have my quiet time to read, watch television, drink a glass of wine, take a bath, etc. What makes me crazy and anxious is when people are loud during this time.

The first six months (okay year and a half) of her life I was looking at Dave as he banged dishes or talked loudly with friends during quiet time with an exasperated look saying "Seriously? Don't you get it? Keep it down!". My sister is the worst, she clomps around the house like an elephant while Samantha is sleeping, blasts her music and shouts while speaking with her friends.

I have learned that for the most part Samantha does just fine sleeping through music blaring, video game playing and even Sara. I'm working on getting in my quiet time without being overly controlling about the noise level all of the time. But, if she is sleeping and you are around, do me a favor and do your best to please be quiet!

New Year

When I lived in Costa Rica, my host mom (who was a real character) told me that on the first of the year you should spend your day doing what you want to be doing for the rest of the year. So, if you want to run a marathon, you should go for a run or if you want to travel, go for a quick trip.

I spent my new year's day napping, visiting with close friends who were in town and playing with Samantha. I can't think of a better way to spend the next year. A lot of my friends have commented on what a tough year 2009 was, one that they are happy to see over and done with. I definitely want the best for everyone but for me, it was a very special year as Samantha has grown and developed into an incredible kid. I love babies and I thought as Samantha developed and grew into herself I would be sad, but it really is amazing to watch as she grasps new things and understands more.

Lately she is doing all of the animal noises, that will have to be my next video! For all the fun photos, check here to see what I got during the holidays.