As we approach Samantha's first birthday I have realized that one thing is clear - I have been obsessed with breastfeeding. From early anxiety here before she was born, to trouble getting started here, and then to how much I loved it here, the topic of breastfeeding has come up more than anything else.
Also in these blog posts I have promised a few things that I have faltered on. For example, I condemned mothers breastfeeding in public but then just a few short weeks after giving birth I was doing the same myself. I even said I wouldn't write blog posts about breastfeeding anymore which is obviously not the case and I swore that I would not continue breastfeeding past the year mark. But, here I am, days before her first birthday and I am still nursing away and writing a blog about it.
So today I'm not going to make any grand promises, I have "started" the weaning process but while feeling the need to connect with my baby who is almost a year old, I snuck in some extra feedings over the weekend - yikes! I am much more of a Boulder mom than I ever imagined. Maybe I should see if La Leche League needs volunteers.
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Showing posts sorted by relevance for query breastfeeding. Sort by date Show all posts
One Final Post on Breastfeeding
My friend and former boss Jennifer Wilson has given me some great advice and words of wisdom over the years. I consider her one of my "role model moms". During my pregnancy when I was stressed about breastfeeding I told her some of the horror stories I had heard and she told me that people only talk about breastfeeding when they are having a difficult time and they forget to discuss it once things are going smoothly. She encouraged me to give it a try and told me what a wonderful experience she had breastfeeding her kids.
That is why I wanted to write one final blog post about breastfeeding and how happy I am that I stuck with it. I know it sounds all hippie Boulder but I love sharing feeding time with Samantha. It truly is a bonding experience. Along with all the benefits for Samantha like boosting intelligence and helping fight and protect against infections, allergies, respiratory problems and disease, it also makes me feel good. I've heard before that you have a release of oxytocin while you nurse and I believe it. Plus, it has definitely helped burn the calories after giving birth.
Don't worry, I won't continue past the year mark but I want to encourage the new moms I know to hang in there and stick with it, in my opinion it really is worth it. Thanks again Jennifer for all your insight and encouragement and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
That is why I wanted to write one final blog post about breastfeeding and how happy I am that I stuck with it. I know it sounds all hippie Boulder but I love sharing feeding time with Samantha. It truly is a bonding experience. Along with all the benefits for Samantha like boosting intelligence and helping fight and protect against infections, allergies, respiratory problems and disease, it also makes me feel good. I've heard before that you have a release of oxytocin while you nurse and I believe it. Plus, it has definitely helped burn the calories after giving birth.
Don't worry, I won't continue past the year mark but I want to encourage the new moms I know to hang in there and stick with it, in my opinion it really is worth it. Thanks again Jennifer for all your insight and encouragement and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Forgot to Mention...
I realized it has been 6 weeks and I haven't written anything about my most blogged about topic - breastfeeding! While having two kids is double the work, there are many things that are much easier the second time around and first and foremost is breastfeeding. You may remember that I was determined to breastfeed Samantha and had a very rough start. To be honest, I think it was close to 8 weeks that were really painful for me before we got the hang of things. Then, because of the many benefits and because I enjoyed the connection so much, I continued breastfeeding until Samantha was about 14 months.
In the hospital, one of the nurses asked me how long I breastfed my first child and without thinking I proclaimed "Forever! Well, not forever by Boulder standards". She and another nurse laughed and then they both proceeded to explain that they had nursed their kids until they were 2 and 3, ha!
I don't think people talk enough about the the ups and downs of breastfeeding and I'm always trying to encourage people to stick with it. After a few weeks with Carina, we had things down. She is a great eater and I know it helps that I'm not so anxious about it, there is much less doubt about what I'm doing and I know how convenient it is and what a great bonding experience it provides. Plus, Carina even takes a bottle now like a champ so I can have a little time away too.
In the hospital, one of the nurses asked me how long I breastfed my first child and without thinking I proclaimed "Forever! Well, not forever by Boulder standards". She and another nurse laughed and then they both proceeded to explain that they had nursed their kids until they were 2 and 3, ha!
I don't think people talk enough about the the ups and downs of breastfeeding and I'm always trying to encourage people to stick with it. After a few weeks with Carina, we had things down. She is a great eater and I know it helps that I'm not so anxious about it, there is much less doubt about what I'm doing and I know how convenient it is and what a great bonding experience it provides. Plus, Carina even takes a bottle now like a champ so I can have a little time away too.
Reading and Breastfeeding
So many people told me to get my reading in before having Samantha. Once she is born, they told me, you won't be doing any reading at all. I have found that quite the opposite has been true. I started reading during the middle of the night feedings to help me get back to sleep and I realized that reading while breastfeeding was much better than staring off into space, watching TV or letting my mind wander. Plus, it is a great use all that time I spend feeding Samantha - I think I have been averaging about a book a week.
For over a year my mom and younger sister have been encouraging me to read "the vampire book" as they call it. My mom brought over Twilight while I was on bed rest and it wasn't until about a month ago that I finally decided to read it. After reading the first 20 pages, I explained to my younger sister that this teen book was rather juvenile for me. I told her that I would read this one but no others in the series (there are 4 books total in the saga).
I had to quickly call Madeline and apologize as I couldn't put the book down. I was also calling to ask if she could bring me the second book. I never got hooked to the Harry Potter books but I imagine that the obsession I have is similar to what everyone was raving about. It is fair to say that I am hooked on the vampire books! I am sad that I am almost finished with the fourth and final book now but I recommend them to anyone looking for a thrilling and fun series.
For over a year my mom and younger sister have been encouraging me to read "the vampire book" as they call it. My mom brought over Twilight while I was on bed rest and it wasn't until about a month ago that I finally decided to read it. After reading the first 20 pages, I explained to my younger sister that this teen book was rather juvenile for me. I told her that I would read this one but no others in the series (there are 4 books total in the saga).
I had to quickly call Madeline and apologize as I couldn't put the book down. I was also calling to ask if she could bring me the second book. I never got hooked to the Harry Potter books but I imagine that the obsession I have is similar to what everyone was raving about. It is fair to say that I am hooked on the vampire books! I am sad that I am almost finished with the fourth and final book now but I recommend them to anyone looking for a thrilling and fun series.
Perils of Breastfeeding
If breastfeeding did not offer so many benefits for a growing baby, I would have given up on it already. I learned that a minute or two of bad positioning can lead to some serious pain for days later. I took a 24 hour break and had a lactation specialist come over for a visit. Things are getting better every day but again, one feeding can be a big set back if you aren't paying proper attention and I think it will take me awhile to really master this. However, I am determined to do it.
Today marks the passing of the two week mark since Samantha was born which means that I can get out and about on my own. This is HUGE for me after the month of bed rest leading up to her birth and I am very anxious to get out of this house by myself. I am feeling better every day after the c-section and I think it will really help my mind and spirit to get some independence back. I have appreciated the help from everyone around me but I am ready to do some things on my own (with Samantha at my side of course!) and get into our own groove just the two of us.
Samantha continues to be the best baby ever and it's hard to believe, but she gets more beautiful every day - I'll put some new pictures up this weekend to prove it. Plus the past two nights she has let me have some decent sleep so she gets even more bonus points.
Today marks the passing of the two week mark since Samantha was born which means that I can get out and about on my own. This is HUGE for me after the month of bed rest leading up to her birth and I am very anxious to get out of this house by myself. I am feeling better every day after the c-section and I think it will really help my mind and spirit to get some independence back. I have appreciated the help from everyone around me but I am ready to do some things on my own (with Samantha at my side of course!) and get into our own groove just the two of us.
Samantha continues to be the best baby ever and it's hard to believe, but she gets more beautiful every day - I'll put some new pictures up this weekend to prove it. Plus the past two nights she has let me have some decent sleep so she gets even more bonus points.
Empowered
Life has been chaotic these days. Dave is doing a lot of networking and schmooze events, I'm trying to connect with my new coworkers by going to softball games and lunches, Carina is crawling and into everything, Samantha is becoming more imaginative and creative, I've had a few work trips, I'm still breastfeeding and Carina usually does not sleep through the night.
All that and I have to tell you that I can't remember the last time I felt so happy. Don't get me wrong, I'm tired and at times it definitely feels like a wild juggling act. But what a feeling to be able to (for the most part) keep all the balls in the air. My job is stimulating and I'm excited about what I'm doing and what the company is starting. I still feel like I'm really involved with the girls and thanks to my mom and my mother in law, I feel like they are always in the best of hands.
I've talked before about prioritizing life and as a parent how difficult that can be. However, lately I have this sneaking suspicion that it may be possible to have it all. Could that be? I may not exercise as much as I want to, read every book club book or keep in touch with as many friends as I'd like, but I feel like both Dave and I are accomplishing a lot at home and at work and we are kicking ass doing it.
All that and I have to tell you that I can't remember the last time I felt so happy. Don't get me wrong, I'm tired and at times it definitely feels like a wild juggling act. But what a feeling to be able to (for the most part) keep all the balls in the air. My job is stimulating and I'm excited about what I'm doing and what the company is starting. I still feel like I'm really involved with the girls and thanks to my mom and my mother in law, I feel like they are always in the best of hands.
I've talked before about prioritizing life and as a parent how difficult that can be. However, lately I have this sneaking suspicion that it may be possible to have it all. Could that be? I may not exercise as much as I want to, read every book club book or keep in touch with as many friends as I'd like, but I feel like both Dave and I are accomplishing a lot at home and at work and we are kicking ass doing it.
Breast Feeding Anxiety
I had one of my first psycho pregnancy moments at around 8 weeks when I told my husband that I wanted to take a breast feeding class. His response was "Even animals breast feed Carly, it can't be hard. It is totally natural, why in the world would you need to take a class?". We don't need to get into the details but I can assure you it wasn't a fun rest of the evening for Dave.
I have heard more horror stories about breast feeding than labor. Aside from getting it to work, how long to feed, how to have the baby latch, being in pain, etc., I just don't know where I feel it is appropriate to feed your baby.
I have mentioned before how many females we have in my family. I don't think I noted that they are all very opinionated females. At one family event when I was a kid, a male relative made some comment about how if someone in the family was breastfeeding, they should go into one of the back bedrooms alone. Everyone has been talking about what a jerk he is for the last 20 years. I was raised to believe that women get to decide what happens with their babies and their bodies.
But...I do live in Boulder and people are always pushing the limit and making me uncomfortable. In my last yoga class, a woman brought her baby. The baby slept most of the time but woke up and was fussy in the last half of class. I was in my deep meditative state as we did some breathing exercises on the exercise ball when I opened my eyes slightly to see that the woman had taken her shirt off and was sitting on the ball bouncing and breast feeding. You must be kidding me right?! And, last week when Dave and I went to interview a pediatrician, there was a woman baring all - and I do mean all, in the lobby. The baby was clearly not interested in eating and she was trying to coax the baby into eating for all to see! When she was called in for the appointment, she gave the baby to her husband and even stood up and started walking into her appointment before covering herself up -- excuse me!
I need all women to help me out for the next few months. I'm not asking you to hide out in a back bedroom, but for the love of God, cover yourself up a little bit!
I have heard more horror stories about breast feeding than labor. Aside from getting it to work, how long to feed, how to have the baby latch, being in pain, etc., I just don't know where I feel it is appropriate to feed your baby.
I have mentioned before how many females we have in my family. I don't think I noted that they are all very opinionated females. At one family event when I was a kid, a male relative made some comment about how if someone in the family was breastfeeding, they should go into one of the back bedrooms alone. Everyone has been talking about what a jerk he is for the last 20 years. I was raised to believe that women get to decide what happens with their babies and their bodies.
But...I do live in Boulder and people are always pushing the limit and making me uncomfortable. In my last yoga class, a woman brought her baby. The baby slept most of the time but woke up and was fussy in the last half of class. I was in my deep meditative state as we did some breathing exercises on the exercise ball when I opened my eyes slightly to see that the woman had taken her shirt off and was sitting on the ball bouncing and breast feeding. You must be kidding me right?! And, last week when Dave and I went to interview a pediatrician, there was a woman baring all - and I do mean all, in the lobby. The baby was clearly not interested in eating and she was trying to coax the baby into eating for all to see! When she was called in for the appointment, she gave the baby to her husband and even stood up and started walking into her appointment before covering herself up -- excuse me!
I need all women to help me out for the next few months. I'm not asking you to hide out in a back bedroom, but for the love of God, cover yourself up a little bit!
Sleep Training: Take Two
For the past five days, we have been doing some sleep training at our house with Carina, otherwise known as "cry it out". I have been putting this off for awhile and feeling like it was harder this time around because Carina is my baby. Luckily this trusty blog serves as my memory and after looking back, we did sleep training for Samantha at this exact same time in her life and it turns out it was hard on me then too.
I started sleeping in the basement on Saturday but I could still hear her cries and went to her after about 5-10 minutes the first few nights. The third night as I was going to her, she stopped crying and went back to sleep and last night she slept through the night. I tell you, as painful as it is to let her cry, it totally works and it works quickly.
Carina has also for the most part weaned me. Unlike Samantha who I nursed until she was 14 months old, this little lady is too busy to be bothered with breastfeeding. I still nurse her in the mornings (and was in the middle of the night feedings) when she is sleepy. But, if she has energy she has no interest in taking the time to eat. With my pumping schedule and travel I've been doing with work, I should be relieved but I'm still not quite ready. I am coming to terms with the idea that Carina is my last baby and it really makes all the transitions sad to me. I think I'll try to keep it up for one more month.
Work, Guilt and Letting Go
I've almost completed my first two weeks of work and the transition could not have gone smoother. The people I work with are sharp, fun and innovative. My 5 minute commute to Pearl Street is amazing. My manager is encouraging but gives me free reign to develop marketing programs that I believe will be successful. We end every week with a BBQ on our outdoor patio that overlooks the Flatirons, for a native of Boulder, it couldn't get any better.
Of course I miss the girls and it is the challenge every working parent faces, I feel guilty being away from them and then I also feel guilty when I am enjoying what I'm doing away from them. Both Dave and I talk a lot about the value I am providing - giving the girls an example of a successful, working mom who enjoys what I do while also loving them whole heartedly.
The main thing I have been stressing about is breastfeeding/pumping. Because I was anticipating being home with Carina three days a week, I didn't stock pile a lot of milk over the months I was on maternity leave. Now, I'm running low on supply and it looks like I'll most likely need to do some formula to supplement. Of course this isn't the end of the world but it feels like it and I'm beating myself up about the idea of it. It's one of many things I need to give myself a break on and let go.
Of course I miss the girls and it is the challenge every working parent faces, I feel guilty being away from them and then I also feel guilty when I am enjoying what I'm doing away from them. Both Dave and I talk a lot about the value I am providing - giving the girls an example of a successful, working mom who enjoys what I do while also loving them whole heartedly.
The main thing I have been stressing about is breastfeeding/pumping. Because I was anticipating being home with Carina three days a week, I didn't stock pile a lot of milk over the months I was on maternity leave. Now, I'm running low on supply and it looks like I'll most likely need to do some formula to supplement. Of course this isn't the end of the world but it feels like it and I'm beating myself up about the idea of it. It's one of many things I need to give myself a break on and let go.
A Great Gig
The question I get most often these days is "How is everything working out with your job?" I have heard horror stories about returning to work, about employers with little flexibility and the perils of being a working mom. However, I am happy to say that my experience has been nothing but positive.
I will admit that, back here, I was feeling a little sorry for myself having to return to the working world. I enjoyed my maternity leave and the special time I had with Samantha.
I can't say enough about my wonderful mom who has been my saving grace but I also want to give credit to my employer. Return Path, the company I work for, prides itself on putting employees first. The incredible thing is that it isn't just "talk" but a foundation that the company stands on. My boss Leah was extremely considerate when we set my schedule of time working in the office and at my parents' house. This has allowed me to continue breastfeeding (and spend my lunch breaks with my mom and Samantha). My role was also modified to better fit my new schedule of working 80% with my Fridays off.
The important thing to note is that because of the understanding and kindness I have been shown, I have been re-energized in my role and am excited to work hard, make a difference and shine for the company. After four years with the company I am even more passionate about my work than the day I started. A core belief at Return Path is that happy employees make for happy clients which makes for happy investors. I am a living example of the very happy employee and based on the continued success of the company I think the theory works.
I will admit that, back here, I was feeling a little sorry for myself having to return to the working world. I enjoyed my maternity leave and the special time I had with Samantha.
I can't say enough about my wonderful mom who has been my saving grace but I also want to give credit to my employer. Return Path, the company I work for, prides itself on putting employees first. The incredible thing is that it isn't just "talk" but a foundation that the company stands on. My boss Leah was extremely considerate when we set my schedule of time working in the office and at my parents' house. This has allowed me to continue breastfeeding (and spend my lunch breaks with my mom and Samantha). My role was also modified to better fit my new schedule of working 80% with my Fridays off.
The important thing to note is that because of the understanding and kindness I have been shown, I have been re-energized in my role and am excited to work hard, make a difference and shine for the company. After four years with the company I am even more passionate about my work than the day I started. A core belief at Return Path is that happy employees make for happy clients which makes for happy investors. I am a living example of the very happy employee and based on the continued success of the company I think the theory works.
It Only Took Two Weeks
You may remember I wrote a blog posting about breastfeeding here back in May. I received a lot of feedback, and many of you offered advice. Dave's sweet cousin Dana even sent me a very cool "Hooter Hider" to avoid being a typical Boulder mom.
I am writing now to admit that it only took two weeks for me to lose most of my modesty and do exactly what I was complaining about before having a baby. On Friday, our doctor's visit went long, we had to go down to the lab for a blood test and and the whole outing took much longer than expected. Samantha became fussy as we waited for her to get her foot pricked and I knew it was time to feed her.
Being a new mom, I was not prepared with my "Hooter Hider" or any real cover for that matter. But, what do I care right? I went into the corner of the waiting room and just started nursing right there. When we were called in for her blood work, there I was just walking right into the room while I nursed for everyone to see! I actually nursed her until the whole thing was over. Hey, these days, when you get her to latch correctly and the feeding is going well, there is no stopping her because you are embarrassed! Hopefully I did not scare any expectant mothers and I promise I will try to be more prepared as time goes by. Apparently most of those things you promise never to do as a mother get thrown out the window very quickly.
I am writing now to admit that it only took two weeks for me to lose most of my modesty and do exactly what I was complaining about before having a baby. On Friday, our doctor's visit went long, we had to go down to the lab for a blood test and and the whole outing took much longer than expected. Samantha became fussy as we waited for her to get her foot pricked and I knew it was time to feed her.
Being a new mom, I was not prepared with my "Hooter Hider" or any real cover for that matter. But, what do I care right? I went into the corner of the waiting room and just started nursing right there. When we were called in for her blood work, there I was just walking right into the room while I nursed for everyone to see! I actually nursed her until the whole thing was over. Hey, these days, when you get her to latch correctly and the feeding is going well, there is no stopping her because you are embarrassed! Hopefully I did not scare any expectant mothers and I promise I will try to be more prepared as time goes by. Apparently most of those things you promise never to do as a mother get thrown out the window very quickly.
Life is an Orchestra
Someday you should ask me about my host family in Costa Rica. What an adventure it was to live with them. My host mom was a real character. We would sit around, drink coffee and smoke cigarettes for hours on end and she would give me her take on life along with all sorts of colorful analogies. I kept saying I would write down all of her classic advice and of course I never did but a few things have stuck with me.
She told me once to think of all the pieces of my life as an instrument. You have to work on each one, keep practicing and when you have things in a good place, your life will sound like a beautiful orchestra. One off instrument can cause huge disruptions to the overall synergy so you can't let anything slip or the music will start screeching and life won't sound the way you intended. I have always wanted to live inside of a musical and I love thinking of this.
Lately I feel like I have all the instruments in order, playing a beautiful song to the story of my life. I have been feeling an occasional guilt because life feels so good, I am really happy and I don't know that I want to have another baby. I have been working out a lot, going to yoga, going out to dinner with girlfriends, taking trips for work and fun. Samantha is so fun, I feel like she and Dave are all that I need. The more time that goes by, I am not sure I ever want to be pregnant, waking in the night, breastfeeding, or doing the whole baby thing again. Selfish yes, but honest as well.
She told me once to think of all the pieces of my life as an instrument. You have to work on each one, keep practicing and when you have things in a good place, your life will sound like a beautiful orchestra. One off instrument can cause huge disruptions to the overall synergy so you can't let anything slip or the music will start screeching and life won't sound the way you intended. I have always wanted to live inside of a musical and I love thinking of this.
Lately I feel like I have all the instruments in order, playing a beautiful song to the story of my life. I have been feeling an occasional guilt because life feels so good, I am really happy and I don't know that I want to have another baby. I have been working out a lot, going to yoga, going out to dinner with girlfriends, taking trips for work and fun. Samantha is so fun, I feel like she and Dave are all that I need. The more time that goes by, I am not sure I ever want to be pregnant, waking in the night, breastfeeding, or doing the whole baby thing again. Selfish yes, but honest as well.
Getting Into the Swing of Things
I apologize for the lack of news, it is not because things are uneventful around here. Samantha is almost four weeks old now which makes me sad because the past few weeks have gone so quickly. She is growing fast and weighed 8 lbs 6 ounces on Friday - even though the breastfeeding is still a bit painful for me, she is apparently getting what she needs which is good.
She has a really wonderful personality, people ask us often if we realize what a good baby she is. She truly seems content and she doesn't cry often, if she does it is usually because she is hungry. Samantha has fantastic expressions. It blows me away how she makes the same faces that Dave and I do, it is hysterical to see the perturbed look that Dave has coming from a tiny baby. I would even say she is a pretty darn good sleeper lately. She goes for about 3-5 hour stretches which really means one middle of the night feeding and some decent sleep for us all.
We have had a very, very steady stream of visitors. Everyone has been very supportive and loving, bringing dinners and gifts for the baby. It is also really nice when we have some uninterrupted alone time and feel like we are adjusting to our new life as a family.
She has a really wonderful personality, people ask us often if we realize what a good baby she is. She truly seems content and she doesn't cry often, if she does it is usually because she is hungry. Samantha has fantastic expressions. It blows me away how she makes the same faces that Dave and I do, it is hysterical to see the perturbed look that Dave has coming from a tiny baby. I would even say she is a pretty darn good sleeper lately. She goes for about 3-5 hour stretches which really means one middle of the night feeding and some decent sleep for us all.
We have had a very, very steady stream of visitors. Everyone has been very supportive and loving, bringing dinners and gifts for the baby. It is also really nice when we have some uninterrupted alone time and feel like we are adjusting to our new life as a family.
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